I think I finally fixed my insanely poor sleeping habits! This brings me joy. Applied for more jobs last night, which is another happy thing. I might have mentioned that yesterday.
I can’t explain why I’m happy. I am at peace in a (literally) diseased world. At least for now, which is all anyone has. I am not under the mistaken impression that the peace and weightlessness of tonight will follow me into the next month, or even week. But it’s here and I must brand it to my memory for when things get inevitably worse.
Must, must, must remember.
I haven‘t seen anyone other than my immediate family since Monday, but those are my favorite people so I’ll chalk it up to a blessing.
I love being around those weirdos even though we drive each other crazy at times. That’s any family. And none of us are without our demons, but show me anyone that doesn’t have at least 2-3.
I am lucky that even though my parents are divorced, they are amicable. My brother is living with my mom now since my dad has been sick, but I still see them both frequently.
So that’s life. It’s beautiful, but that’s not the same as “easy.” I don’t think everyone realizes that.
I can find good places, even if they are only in my heart. Or books and friendships! There’s no greater power than our ability to control our thoughts. But you and I must think of hope and peace. It’s not going to be constant, but we can make it our home base. It takes a hell of a lot of practice and/or medication.
So that was today. It was enough to keep me rowing and engaged.
Could I ever ask for more?
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